Hollywood: They Owe Us!


Do you enjoy the phrase, “Careful what you wish for?” Me too!

How about “teaching semi-celebrities a lesson?” Me three!

If any of these things appeals to you, or you just have a thirst for mischief–OR, if you’re one of those people who like to participate in things, but don’t want to work too hard to do it, then help me out by following Steve Agee on Twitter.

Today, he made an appeal that if he gets 5000 followers by Friday, he’s going to make a video blog where he thanks all of them by name.

As of this writing, he’s at about 3500.

Now, why am I so interested in making sure he gets to 5000 followers? Did he pay me or something?


It’s because I don’t think he’s really sat down and thought about how long it’s going to take him to read off a list of 5000+ names.

Let’s say he’s not going to add “thank you <blank> in front of each and just says “thank you, <blank>, <blank>, <blank>… etc.” If he doesn’t take a break and can manage to say each in an average of two seconds, which is pretty quick, if you try it, that’s about 10,000 seconds.

5000 followers x 2 seconds/follower = 10,000 seconds

10,000 seconds x 1 minute/60 seconds = 166.67 minutes

166.67 minutes = (roughly) 2 hours, 47 minutes

So what, you ask? Can you imagine sitting there, reading off a giant list that you probably burned through fifty bucks in ink just to make? For almost 3 hours??

And that’s if everything goes well!

Now, also imagine you’re a busy, Hollywood, almost-celebrity and this bullshit is takin’ time out of your busy schedule of lunching with George Hamilton at Spago, or doing coke in a Lamborghini Countach with Kathy Ireland, or whatever the hell millionaires from basic cable TV shows do with their free time.

But he can’t just “not do it”! Because the backlash would destroy him! He’d lose his lucrative endorsement deals with the Tetlea Tea Company!

Oh yes, I think Mr. Steve Agee has really dug himself a pretty big hole with this one!

So if you’re on twitter, please head over to twitter.com/steveagee and click on ‘follow’. And if you’re not, just sign up for an account, it’s the future and if you aren’t on it, you seem old and foolish and out of touch with the kids today.

This could be your only chance to bump elbows (in an admittedly brief and unsatisfying way) with the stars!



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