Suck on this, California!





  1. I think McRibs are actually made from the remains of Don the Talking Horse. Not the actual horse, mind you, but John Candy, the actor who supplied the voice of Don. They finally ran out of rib meat from his ample frame, so that is why the McRib is on its farewell tour.

  2. As much as I gave you points for your last post, Scott, I have to take equal umbrage with you now. It is unfortunate when people just latch on to everything the left-wing media puts out there as fact, and the false rumours remain unchallenged due to the complicity of other liberal outlets.
    As anyone who has done the reasearch is well aware, the main ingredient in the McRib is actually the crushed and formed fragments of broken pigggy-banks. That is where it gets its signature “ceramic” taste as well as its pinkish hue. This was brought up recently on an edition if “Hannity and Colmes”, but the leftist journalistic hate machine has refused to acknowledge it. Curse You, Global Warming!

  3. He is indeed a burn victim, but only on his gizwick. He derives his bone structure and his facial features from his mother’s side of the family. Her maiden name is Skeletor. He has limited influence in the Marxist, venom-spewing, queer-centric media because he is merely a Fox News “token liberal”. As soon as the show is over, they put him back in a cage with Ellis Henican and feed them antifreeze and gunpowder.

  4. I never really got into the McRib. It’s not neccessarily the taste, I just have a real problem with textures. I can’t stand things in my mouth that are slimy, and that after a minute or two, turn from warm to cold. And don’t even get me started on salty meats!

    I just gave you guys a slow pitch right down the middle, do with it what you will.

  5. I never really got into baseball. It’s not necesarily the pace, I just have a real problem with balls. I can’t stand things in my mitt that are leathery, and that after an throw or two, go from host to visitor. And don’t even get me started on stadium toilet seats!

    I just shaved my thighs, they itch right down the middle, Poo mist gets on them still.

  6. You actually sit on the stadium toilets? Two words my friend, Crotch Cricktes!

    A large percentage of Herpes sufferers actually DESERVE them. A little knowledge and quite a bit of paranoia can go a long way. Pit-Pat, take some advise from a lady (if you know one) and HOVER ABOVE the seat. Those thin paper seat covers? Don’t even bother with them. They are infested with God’s little groin maggots.

    As far as the Poo Mist goes, just how wide is your ruby starfruit anyhow? Poo Mist not only sounds rare, but incredibly disgusting as well. Please, for the sake of yourself and those around you, get that checked out.



  7. The last time I saw a man attack food so ferociously was when I saw Brian Dennehy at Chili’s. That man was practically making love to his baby backs.

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