This is a new feature where people will ask for my advice and I will give it to them. It can be about anything. I do this on my friend David Lawrence’s radio show every once in a while, but that’s mostly a test of my improv skills where I make shit up. This is actually stuff I know a lot about and can help you with. So if you need advice, just ask me and then I will help you. Like this girl:
Date: Nov 27, 2007 9:45 PM
find me a guy
Date: Nov 28, 2007 10:32 AM
I’ve been thinking alot about this. You need to improve your image. Go to a nudist camp. That way, when you meet a guy, you can say, “I just got back from a nudist camp”. This will start them thinking about you naked and add to your allure. Also, the same goes with lesbians. Even if you don’t like it. You know what you should do? You should try and hook up with a chick in the dressing room at Victoria’s Secret. Seriously. Then you can tell a guy about it and he will propose marriage right there. Like you were trying on bras or something and the saleslady will come in and help you and you just start kissing. Trust me, I know you think I’m kidding, but this will work. It will create a buzz about you that guys like. Like some guy will say, “Oh yeah, that girl Becky, she seems nice” and the other guy will go, “Nice? Are you kidding? That bitch is crazy! She hooked up with some chick in the Victoria’s Secret dressing room!” Then those guys will get a boner and want to have sex with you. Problem solved!