Not really. But it is a weird coincidence. Which is what most people mistake for irony. That and “poetic justice.”
That is real. It is the actual fortune from the cookie I received at dinner. Not a member of my party. Me.
Me. The guy who dislocated the lens in his eye yesterday afternoon.
In 1998, I had the lens of my left eye pulled out and replaced with a plastic one. Well, now it seems that it has come loose.
4 open heart surgeries. 2 or 3 more scheduled in the future; not to mention any fun ‘surprises’ fate has in store for me. Add to this all the bullshit with my eyes and you may share my rather bleak outlook on life.
And then I get this. A second opinion. Smooth sailing from here on in, friends.
I suppose this means my eye problems will just solve themselves, so I have no need to go to the doctor.
He called earlier. I sent him straight to voice mail. Delete.
Maybe this strikes you as stupid or irresponsible, but you’re forgetting one thing: fortune cookies are made by Chinese people. They know this kind of stuff. I am led to believe they are very spiritual, so I think everything’s gonna be OK.
If they can invent chopsticks and firecracks and all that martial arts stuff, I’m sure they know a few things about something as dumb as eyes. They’re just blobs of goo, afterall.
So now who’s the stupid one?