I know I haven’t posted in a while. It is taking me longer to heal than I had initially thought. My doctors keep telling me that this stuff will be no big deal and I am dumb enough to believe them.
Anyway, I will try and put up a real blog this week. In the meantime, here are some things I’ve noticed.
Have you seen those Wendy’s commercials where they put put the price of everything in terms of how many things from the $.99 value meal you could buy? These three guys get offered 9 million dollars and they figure, “That’s 3 million Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers each – before taxes!”
Let me digress for a moment and give them kudos for even mentioning the idea of things being taxed in this country, a fact that is conveniently ignored in every single other commercial on television.
That said, this is just faulty math.
The Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger is $.99, not a dollar.
“Big deal,” you say, “that’s only a penny!”
Granted, but when you are talking about things in the millions, those pennies start to add up.
Case in point, 3 million dollars ($9 million split evenly 3 ways) will actually buy you 3,030,308 Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers, not 3 million Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers, as claimed in the commercial.
That’s a difference of 30,309 Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers! You know how many starving people in Darfur that could feed? Millions! Not counting the ones who are Muslim who wouldn’t eat something that had touched the bacon, but still, that’s a lot.
So, in summation, the media with its “New York Sensibilities” has lied to us, yet again. But don’t worry, fair readers, even in my drug-induced, semi-retarded stupor, I am here to protect you from fraud and wrong-doing. Like if Superman and Jesus had a kid who was in a wheelchair.