Metal sucks

Have you ever heard Vince Neil or one of those guys bitch about how Nirvana ruined their careers? They can’t understand why anyone would want to listen to depressing music like that. Music is about escape and having a great time!

To that, I give you:

“Unskinny Bop”

Remember that song? It was right toward the end of Poison’s career. What the hell does that even mean? My brother and I used to assume it meant “fat bop”. Mystery solved, I guess.

You want a music career? You want people to listen to you? Stop writting about nonsense. This isn’t even nonsense. It’s gibberish. It must have taken all of seventeen seconds to write that song.

“Let’s just randomly put two words together that don’t even make sense and make a song about it.”

You know why hair metal died? Cuz it sucks. Except for Mr. Big. Those guys were great. I only heard that one song they had, but I’m eagerly awaiting the follow up. They had an album called “Bump ahead”. And it had a picture of a head in the middle of the road. A human head! And I think it was like the lead singer’s head, too.

So in summation, all hair metal sucks. Except for Mr. Big, which rules all.


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