I know it actually exists, but stories like this, make me wonder if somebody isn’t making this stuff up. I guess you wouldn’t call these people ‘rednecks’, I think they’re technically ‘hillbillies’. Anyway, they’re losing their teeth. By the bucketful.
The central Appalachian states lead the nation in toothlessness. More than 32 percent of Tennessee residents surveyed last year had lost six or more teeth because of decay or gum disease, according to the Centers for Disease Control. That number was 38 percent in Kentucky and 43 percent in West Virginia, which holds the distinction of the most toothless state. Kentucky ranked No. 1 in toothlessness in 2003.
43 percent? Lost six or more teeth?? And these people think it’s normal! Well no wonder, just look at their flawed logic!
“People feel like they can do without teeth, or that they can always buy false ones,” said David Aker, mountain missions director for the Kentucky Baptist Convention.
How much are false teeth? I’m guessing they’ve gotta be pretty expensive, right? Yet in this same article, some lady is complaining that a dental procedure for her kids costs $25 and she doesn’t have that kind of money.
Who knew that these gap-toothed hicks, known for their drunken, incestuous antics, were actually in the midst of an epidemic? And not just an epidemic of hilarity, according to this guy:
“The problem is almost epidemic in the state,” said Dr. Gerald Ferretti, a dental professor at the University of Kentucky.
Hey, he would know, right? But most surprising to me is that some of these hillbillies can actually be Italian. And that’s the real message here, I think.